Tuesday 19 May 2009

Coleman gets tough with Bloggers!

New Mayor of Barnet, Brian Coleman, decided to take on the blogging community in his acceptance speech at Barnet Town Hall this evening.

Coleman decried bloggers whom he claimed pulled down civic institutions by attacking officers and councillors.

The Marmite Mayor declared “I will not tolerate it!”

Quite how Barnet’s First Citizen (with special responsibility for canap├ęs) aims to achieve this is anybody’s guess. Perhaps he has been reading Shakespeare’s Henry IV Part II, Act I, Scene I:
Yet, for all this, say not that Percy's dead.
I see a strange confession in thine eye:
Thou shakest thy head and hold'st it fear or sin
To speak a truth. If he be slain, say so;
The tongue offends not that reports his death:
And he doth sin that doth belie the dead,
Not he which says the dead is not alive.
Yet the first bringer of unwelcome news
Hath but a losing office, and his tongue
Sounds ever after as a sullen bell,
Remember'd tolling a departing friend.

Our thanks to Statler & Waldorf for not suing us over the use of their picture.


Statler and Waldorf said...


We have instructed our lawyers to sue you for all your cossetted family wealth.

We shall see you in Court.

In disgust,


Don't Call Me Dave said...

I've got an indemnity

Statler and Waldorf said...


We have better than that. We aren't so rich as to send the butler down to the cellar to auction a bottle of 1905 Fitou.

Mayor Marmite has kindly lent us some Beechcroft hours, for when they aren't writing to the Barnet Times' on his behalf, in order to 'kick your butt' (we think it was kick), as he put it.

He admires our creative artwork and wishes to see it protected.

Beechcroft advised us, over a lovely lunch on the GLA credit card, not to discuss this further. So this will be our last comment on the matter.

With unfuzzyhugs,